Minnesota's Family Law Blog

Secret To Winning Minnesota Family Law Cases

Minnesota Court – Family Law Cases | Pssst, wanna know the secret to winning in a family law case? Ready? Here it is, let the other side think they won… it’s that simple.  If you let the other side think they won, that they pulled one over on you or you gave up, it often ends the conflict and settles the case!  Is it bad to gloat? Well over the years I have had clients or opposing clients do and say silly things that come back to bite them.  Don’t go and parade your new Corvette In front of your ex-spouse or brag to the kids how much better your new spouse is than “mom” or (and this one is my favorite) after the case call your ex and brag you hid a bank account at TCF, haha!

Each one of  those is an actual story, that either my client or the opposing client did in a case. Let me tell you how each one of those stories ended, the Corvette story resulted in my client going to court and modifying child support and getting a few hundred dollars more per month that she would not have received had he wanted to show off his new car.  The bragging about the new spouse caused my client to be dragged back Into court for a very long and costly custody badly that probably could have been avoided if he had not wanted to rub it in. Finally, the hidden bank account caused my client have her divorce case reopened  based on fraud.  Everything could be prevented in those cases if only the person thought a little and kept the secret in mind.  Don’t brag or gloat and let the other side think they won!

I go back to my favorite movie and the line “…feel that? That’s pride messing* with you”   And that is indeed what it is. If you like to pay lawyers and cause many, many hours wasted in court, getting ready to go to court and hanging out in your lawyers office the by all means rub it in, gloat, call and tell how you pulled one over on your spouse.  But, if you’d rather save the money and headache, let them think they won.

I know, your thinking, but he or she has been controlling our marriage the whole time and you are done putting up with it, I hear you, I really do, but I can’t imagine how not following my secret will get you what you want in terms of gaining control in the relationship.  The marriage and/or relationship is dead, over, fini.  Move on.

So when you are about to make that call, or send that email that says ” Aha! I won!”  Think about your lawyer and ask yourself do you really want to buy your lawyer a new convertible?

Information obtained in mankatofamilylaw.com may contain knowledgable content about Minnesota Family Law that may be considered beneficial to some; however, in no way should this website or its contents be considered legal advice. Mr. Kohlmeyer is a Minnesota licensed Attorney and cannot provide legal services or guidance to those outside of Minnesota. If you wish to retain Mr. Kohlmeyer as your Attorney in your Family Law matter, contact 507-205-9736.

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Comments 6
  1. My wifes parents lied to her asked her to sign a contract insurance paper an a year later we find out they had her sign over legal custody they lied in affidavits what can we do

  2. My experiences in Minnesota’s Family Court are horrific–you wouldn’t be joking if you were in the courtroom with me or saw the evidence of the blatant legal insanity that has awarded FULL custody to a wanted fugitive with 12+ child abuse allegations against him..and was diagnosed by the court psych eval as have a mental disorder that can cause dangerous & anti-social behavior. I hold FC responsible for the continued abuse my children have experienced.

    I was physically assaulted, my child injured when caught in the middle, and forced to live on the street with 2 small children–homeless for nearly 18 mos before securing affordable housing. Both kids suffer from PTSD. My child has told therapists time and time again things like “I learn to have my temper tantrums from my Dad”. My “Dad choked me” and he showed the hands wrapping around his neck. My dad hit me on the head. My child came home from dad’s house with a bite mark –you could see a full set of teeth in his skin. The dad let a deranged homeless man move in to give free daycare to the kids (I have evidence of).

    What is the Court’s response? The corrupt & immoral GAL is lying to CPS when I file reports, withholding evidence, inventing evidence, refusing to interview witnesses and giving legal advise to the other party. The Judges are just as bad..throwing out important evidence, holding hearings when I am not in the courtroom, and making rulings based on heresay. When I filed a motion for endangerment my parenting time was cut to one visit a month and I got fined attorney’s fees. I can’t believe this is happening in America, land of the free & home of the barve,

    Someone needs to shine a spotlight on the horrors happening in Family Court.

    1. Minnesota Mom, thanks for the comment.

      No court system is perfect, but there is a Court of Appeals to correct problems like this sounds like if this is accurate the case should be appealed.

    2. Call me at 218-XXXX-XXX and let’s talk about horrors deadling with loser abusers in family court and appeals: seriously.

  3. Pingback: Secret To Winning Minnesota Family Law cases | In Addition To Similar AnalysesGizmo World
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