Congratulations You’re Finally Divorced! Now Get Ready For Another 10 Years of Fighting!

Is Your Divorce Really Over?

Wait a minute, you’re thinking “but the case is over, we went to court and the Judge ruled! What are you old coupletalking about!?” Well the problem is that just because you are divorced you still have kids to raise together!

This is one key concept I see parents forgetting all the time. Remember that just because you are no longer married to your ex, if you have kids, you still have years and years of dealing with him or her on an almost daily basis. You have football games, dances, confirmation, graduations, weddings, grandchildren, baptisms…and the list goes on and on. Thus, you can see why you will have a relationship, yes a different kind of relationship, but a relationship with your ex for years and years to come.

Post-Dissolution Motions

The other issue people often forget about is that if your relationship gets worse after the divorce, your ex can file a motion to bring you back to court, and he or she can do it on a regular basis.  There is the issue of child support, which can be a constant source of problems.  If you two are having problems and can’t work it out you can be brought back to court for what is called a Post-Dissolution motion.  This means any issues you have can be brought up later, such as changing pick up/drop off times and locations, parenting time days, or holiday days and times.  I’ve seen cases where 20 years after the divorce the parties still hate each other so much they can’t talk to each other and find every reason they can to fight.

My free advice? Learn to get along.  Learn to tolerate your ex.  Don’t get worked up about the small things, so what if your ex is 10 minutes late on an exchange? Ask yourself Does it REALLY matter? I bet it doesn’t.

Jason Kohlmeyer
Rosengren Kohlmeyer, Law Office
Mankato, MN 56001

Jason Kohlmeyer

With over 15 years experience in high conflict family law cases, having received numerous awards, and a frequent lecturer through both Minnesota and the United States on family law issues, Jason has decided to help people through a blog, answering some of the most common questions that people have during divorce and family law. cases. Remember this isn't legal advice. Just blog and attempts to answer general questions, for legal advice you need to hire a lawyer. If you're in Minnesota our firm would be happy to see if we can help you.


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